Over You (Songfic)
by The Rain Woman
Summary: A simple NaLi songfic about how Natsu copes without Lisanna over the years following her 'death'. Please R&R!


_Weatherman said it's going to snow_

_By now I should be used to the cold_

Natsu wrapped his muffler back around his neck, and slipped his vest back on after a long night of sleep. He walked down the cobblestone path that led back to the guild, ignoring the shouts of fishermen, who yelled, "Hey, mister! Weatherman said it's going to snow! You might want to bundle up a bit more!" He just shrugged, a response that they frowned at. As he entered the guild, he knew the cold wouldn't effect him. He'd been through worse.

Mid-February shouldn't be so scary

_It was only December_

_I still remember the presents, the tree, you and me_

It's been awhile… Well, not really. Only a few months. And the shock was still etched into his mind. But what he really remembered was the guild's Christmas. Everyone was excited, but Natsu and Lisanna the most. They had started hanging out more often, and Lisanna had even convinced Natsu to make a team consisting of her, himself, and Happy. They were in charge of decorating the tree for the guild, but kept tangling each other up in the Christmas lights. But frankly, they couldn't have cared less. They were too busy being happy, having fun, being carefree and relaxed, to even consider it might be their last Christmas.

_But you went away_

_How dare you?_

_I miss you_

_They say I'll be okay_

_But I'm not going to ever get over you_

He clenched his fists and pounded them against the guild wall, fuming. He ground his teeth, doing his best to forget her. But he knew he couldn't. He'd tried before. He wouldn't be able to now. Mirajane waved a quick hello, but he knew she was just as sad as he was. Their first Christmas without her. She was recovering quicker than him, even though it was her sister. But he doubted she had loved her as much as he did, no matter any family bonds. She had changed a lot because of her sister, though. Gone was the whole punk attitude with the "Fight me, Erza!" screams. Mira now did whatever it took to make anyone feel welcome. No matter what. Natsu wished he could just change himself like she did, so that whenever he heard her name he wouldn't want to pound that person's head in. Nobody dared mention her anymore, lest they get pummeled into the ground. Again. Mira and Elfman, being her brother and sister, knew how close she and Natsu used to be. They told him it would be alright, that he'd get over it, that they should live on happily like she would've wanted. But he never could.

_Living alone here in this place_

_I think of you and I'm not afraid_

Natsu went to his home only when need be. It had too many memories of her. It had grown messy, and he didn't even bother to clean it anymore. There was no one to share the space with, to show around, to laugh with and roll around on the wooden floor. Because she was gone. But somehow, thinking of her, remembering her and how she talked to him, grabbed his arm to pull him over to the request board, how she laughed; somehow made him feel better.

_Your favorite records make me feel better_

_Cause you sing along_

_With every song_

_I know you didn't mean to give them to me_

Every time he went home (at least twice a day- he'd always forget something) he played a few songs from some old records. Nobody used them nowadays, so they were extremely cheap, but hard to come by. She, especially, had grown fond of the ballad "You're Still You", a classic. He could still remember how she had twirled around, singing along to what he called "The Cheesy Weird Song." What did you expect? He wasn't a romantic, and never planned to be one. But she loved him anyways. And now he remembered her, trying to drag him around the room, spinning to the music.

_But you went away_

_How dare you?_

_I miss you_

But now she's gone. Forever. Never to return. To return to Fairy Tail. To return to her brother and sister. To him. He should've told her how much she meant to him before it was too late. He wanted to yell at her, ask her why. But he knew he couldn't. He'd never be able to yell at her. Dragons weren't supposed to show emotion, anyways. But sometimes love is harder to conceal than anyone could ever imagine.

_They say I'll be okay_

_But I'm not going to ever get over you_

Mira, Elfman, all the rest of Fairy Tail… they were all sad at the news. But Natsu? Natsu was devastated. They had pretended to be married, for God's sake! And she was gone? Unbelievable! Natsu wanted to believe it was a joke. That they were all just messing with him, that she was hiding in a closet, giggling quietly at the prank. But he knew it was the truth.

_It really sinks in, you know, when I see it in stone_

He had seen her grave. But to him, it wasn't even close to deserving to mark someone like her. Not in a million years. Besides, he knew she wouldn't have wanted her grave to be in a gloomy old cemetery. So he built her one himself. Outside of the hut where they raised Happy, where they had sat watching the sunset. When he had first realized just how much she meant to him. He'd never been able to say the three words that he had kept bottled up. So now all he could do was talk to her grave, telling her ghost-spirit-whatever-it-was how much he had loved her. And still did.

_Cause you went away_

_How dare you?_

_I miss you_

But now it's years later, and he seems to have moved on. Forgotten about her. But not really. People think he likes Lucy, a celestial mage he recently brought to the guild. And he does. But not like Lisanna. And frankly, at times he just wants to punch Lucy in her face, who cares if they're nakama, because she's so damn like Lisanna, and she doesn't deserve that much. But yeah, he does love Lucy. So now he brought her to Lisanna's grave, told her about how he built it. He could only trust himself with telling her that much. Anymore, and he'd be a complete and utter mess, back to how he was the Mid-February following her death. He'd probably be like that anyways, so it probably didn't matter. Truth was, he just didn't want anyone to know Lisanna like he did. She was his. And he was hers.

_They say I'll be okay_

_But I'm not going to ever get over you_

Lucy does what he expects: tells him it's okay, that she was a good person even if she didn't meet her, blah blah blah. He gets it. But she doesn't. She just thinks Lisanna was awesome (which she was, Natsu wasn't saying she wasn't) and that she was a great mage and whatnot. (Again, Natsu did agree with the 'great mage' part). But he knew Lucy wouldn't understand from the very beginning. She hadn't even met Lisanna, after all. But even if she did, he knew she never would've known her like he had. Or loved her as much as he always would. She held the one place in his heart that he never again let anyone get close to. She was the only one he wanted, the only one he needed. And if he ever got her back, he'd never let her go again.


End file.
